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The term has acquired additional meanings within certain sub-cultures, referring to couples wherein the female is dominant and she takes on additional partners, while the male takes on a submissive role where he is monogamous to her, or only becoming involved sexually when it is felt to be emotionally supportive of her and her lover, or remaining altogether chaste. Men who fetishize this situation are often referred to in the sub-culture as "cucks."

Cuckoldry as a fetish has been around since at least the time of Leopold von Sacher-Masoch (the writer after whom the term "masochism" is coined). Sacher-Masoch's wife, Aurora Rümelin, recounts in her memoirs multiple instances of Sacher-Masoch asking, begging and even threatening her to make her cuckold him so he could experience the pain and humiliation of the act. To that end, Sacher-Masoch created multiple "opportunities" for the adulterous act to occur, none of which were successful. While Rümelin indulged her husband in many of his masochistic requests, due in large part because to her dependence on him to financially support herself and her children, she steadfastly refused to cuckold him. Rümelin's refusal to succumb to Sacher-Masoch's cuckholding fantasies was one of the causes of their separation and her subsequent descent into poverty.

The wife who enjoys cuckoldry is sometimes referred to as a hotwife. In a broader context, the contrast between a cuckold and the additional male participant (sometimes called a "stud" or "bull") is sometimes used to summarize an individuals personality or behaviour and the variability commonly seen in male libidos; the cuckold or beta male suggesting a lack of virility, perhaps sometimes having a small penis, impotence, infertility, vulnerability, weakness, or even anxiety and the stud or alpha male representing virility, potency, a larger phallus, fertility, dynamism, masculinity, strength and a sense of confidence in the ease with which he may sexually possess another man's wife. There are some who consider the use of the term "bull" to be offensive, and this term is also not used commonly in the BDSM community. Interestingly, the more virile male was once almost exclusively referred to as a "stud"; using an equine connotation rather than the bovine one of a "bull".

Cuckolding among female-dominant couples differs from the original definition of cuckolding in that many of these men are voluntarily "cuckolded" by their wives, sometimes as part of the husband's sexual fantasy and sometimes because they gain genuine sexual arousal through being humiliated by his wife being better sexually fulfilled with a potentially superior male. In some cases the husband may instigate and nurture his wife's sexual infidelity, raising the question of who is truly the dominant partner. This is a common theme in letters to erotica magazines and online sites which focus on cuckoldry.

In most modern cases of fantasy "cuckolding" the husband usually finds pleasure through that of his wife (or what he perceives to be her pleasure), and they (the wife and extra-marital participant) may both enjoy attempting to actively include him in the act of cuckolding as much as possible through serving her. Some common themes include praising her appearance, attempting to stimulate her sexually at the same time as the additional participant, and generally being engrossed in her enjoyment, usually while masturbating or involving himself in some sexual act with his wife during their activity.

Some less-common themes might include grooming his wife for her "date", homemaking, or oral sex following the conclusion of sex with the other man. When this oral sex follows ejaculation, it is termed a creampie or cleaning up.

In some cases, "cuckolding" is a means for the husband to express same-sex desires through his wife and/or directly with the additional participant.

In various alternative-lifestyle support groups and online forums, homosexuality is often a primary concern for both couples thinking about participating in "cuckolding", with the heterosexual husband being uneasy about the possibility of a homosexual encounter.

Because cuckolding at its heart is a humiliation fantasy, it works best when the individual with the fantasy believes cuckolding is hopelessly the only choice for their relationship. This may be one of the reasons cuckold fantasy stories tend contain the theme that females are genetically predisposed to desire the "alpha-male", prefer men with larger genitalia or that their wives are driven with wild lust.

While word origin and most historic accounts define the "cuckold husband" or party as being submissive, powerless and/or in need of humiliation to receive stimulation, contemporary practice suggests the possibility of something altogether different. Rather than passively acceeding to the infidelity and desires of an errant wife, this "cuckold" is more in keeping with the male partners defined in polyamorous, open, or swinging relationships.

In this manifestation, the cuckold is a consummate voyeur... who derives great pleasure from seeing his "hot wife" or partner being pleasured and serviced by another male (or males...or a female). Although he assumes a submissive role and may even assist during the course of the sex act, the "cuckhold husband" may actually be the controlling, dominant party in the relationship. He may invite, encourage, and initiate consideration of the practice with his partner, and may be the one to make arrangements and approve how, when and with whom his wife may have the intended encounter. In street parlance, he may "pimp" his wife for the encounters he wishes.

Often, the excitement of the encounter with third parties is followed by more, very stimulating sex play between the relationship partners. The encounter becomes an aphrodisiac, helping to initiate and enhance further sex play between them, as visions of the encounter are revisited and replayed during subsequent love making sessions.